Forget the Fear

Four days in and I’ve hit the barrier. Fourth post and I have nothing. Nothing at all. Well, it wouldn’t be called a challenge if it was easy (it also wouldn’t be worthwhile either!). However, this is definitely an improvement on yesterday’s last minute (literally!) post.

From this blogging challenge, I have been listening to the “voice” in my head at length. The opportunity to de-clutter the constant stream of thoughts every day then consolidate them on digital paper as been very satisfying. Calming even. It has given me the space to connect with “Big-picture” goals, dreams and explore my creativity.

Back when I studying an Advanced Diploma of Photography, I was completely enveloped in the creative world, surrounded by passionate students and utterly consumed by personal creative projects.

After graduating, starting to work solo in my photography business, I quickly became disheartend. Working seven-plus hours a day, getting a trickle income, and not talking to “inspiring students” on a daily basis became very lonely. So naturally, my beautifully cultivated and passionate flame quickly turned to smoke.

I’d justified to myself that I needed to work with a team of people, so I’m not lonely. I needed a boss-like figure to instruct me so I don’t feel lost. These, on a base level, are probably quite acurate. Reflecting on it now, I honestly know I gave up. It all become too much and nothing was growing at the rate I wanted it to. I chose to recieve that fear as failure rather than trust my own abilities and give the business my patience.

Strange how the fear of failure itself can cause us to quit on our dreams and leave passions behind. Fail before you even fail…

I forgot how much I missed my passions. In fact, I forgot how creative I am when inspired about an idea. Now that I’ve reconnected with that passion, I’m not letting it go. (Set the intention!)

Diving head first in to my own personal branding, uploading my portfolio, connecting with friends in the creative industry as been exhilarting! Now with a few more years of life and industry experience behind me, I’ve the confidence to put the time, effort and patience into this business and give this a real go.

Thank you Day 4 for the revelations!

 

 

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